Maybe it is because I am approaching my fourth decade and getting more cynical, but it feels like there is an increasing amount of bad films every year. There have been so many bad films so far this year already, and as we are at the half way stage in the year, now seems a good time to count down what, in my humble view, are the five worst. I implore anyone who has not seen them to simply not even waste their valuable time, and to those of you that have seen any of these five severe crimes against cinema: you have my deepest sympathies and I feel your pain.
I am not claiming this to be a definitive ‘worst films of the year so far run-down’ as reviewing films is my hobby and therefore I refuse to dip into my limited disposable income to pay the price of a cinema ticket to see the likes of The Other Woman, Mrs. Brown’s Boys D’movie (gulp), Grace of Monaco or Blended. I will however of course rent these films when they get their retail release and so expect them to potentially appear in my worst of 2014 run-down at the end of the year, though I will of course watch them with an open mind as they may well be cinematic masterpieces (!). Though, if the first six months of 2014 are anything to go by, expect that end of the year run down to be filled with extreme anger and disgust!
This is not just the worst of 2014 so far, this is the VERY worst!
5. Need for Speed (Scott Waugh)
Video games turned into films are rarely any good, and this Fast & Furious rip-off really should have been a bit of popcorn fun, but was so dull and boring that in the end it was a tougher test of endurance than the Le Mans 24 hours. Whereas the Fast & Furious films have become aware of themselves and have plenty of fun, Need for Speed was primarily delivered straight faced with an outrageously intense and charisma free leading performance from the usually very likeable Aaron Paul. The action scenes are not too bad, but the script, story and acting are all painfully clichéd and lazy, making the outrageously long running time of 130 minutes truly exhausting. Also, the less said about Michael Keaton’s bizarre performance, the better!
To read my review, click here
4. That Awkward Moment (Tom Gormican)
This awful and irritating rom-com was marketed as having an apparently refreshing approach and perspective of a well known story and genre. Well, no it most certainly is not! That Awkward Moment has a distinct lack of originality, or indeed any attempt at decent storytelling. It actually is a humourless, poorly written, clichéd and predictable film featuring characters that it is impossible to relate to or even like, and a truly infuriating and slightly depressing viewing experience.
To read my review, click here
3. Ride Along (Tim Story)
Tim Story’s humourless film happily takes the tried and tested buddy movie template (which in isolation is not necessarily a bad thing) and seems to think that is enough, with no effort made with the story or indeed the action sequences. The two leads are beyond unlikeable; with Ice Cube just looking bored (I know how he feels) and Kevin Hart screeching at the top of his voice and pulling stupid faces. There is not a single laugh and the ‘action’ sequences are dull, making for a big steaming pile of nothing that requires a lot of effort to watch and serves as a depressing reminder just how many films are like this these days.
To read my review, click here
2. Sabotage (David Ayer)
Now this should have been good; Arnie showing his age in an old school gritty action thriller directed by David Ayer. Nope, Sabotage is one of the most arduous experiences of the year and a real nasty piece of work with not a single redeeming feature. Arnie just plays himself as always, but should stick to the tongue-in-cheek actioners as the supposed ‘gritty’ nature of Sabotage makes it a real effort to watch. The acting is atrocious with not a single character offering anything to make them even slightly likeable or compelling, the dialogue (of which there is far too much) is clunky beyond belief and it feels like Ayer made the plot up as he went along. Apparently there was an original cut of the film that was around three hours long, now that is a scary thought!
To read my review, click here
1. A Million Ways to Die in the West (Seth MacFarlane)
Even by Seth MacFarlane’s abysmally low standards, A Million Ways to Die in the West is an atrocious excuse for a film. It is an overlong, ill disciplined, smug, self indulgent mess that is a real stamina test to watch, and barely raises a chuckle. Unfortunately MacFarlane is unaware of the concept of editing, with the film being a succession of overlong sketches that often resort to painfully cheap humour. The supporting cast do their best, but with the material so poor and MacFarlane proving to be an embarrassingly awkward screen presence in his first physical leading role, A Million Ways to Die in the West is a true abomination against film making.
To read my review, click here
thanks for the heads-up. the trailers for each of these were enough to put me off.
They most certainly were. I tried to enter them with an open mind, but they were all horrific viewing experiences! If I have put at least one soul off watching them, then I have succeeded!